(no subject)

An explanation on the characters of this book. The narrator is a little boy, no name given and he is an orphan in the care of his grandmother, who smokes big black cigars, doesn't want her grandson to bathe (it protects from witches), and is pretty much a badass.

Together they fight crime witches. But first, little Nameless has to learn what witches ARE. In the following quote, grandmamma explains what happened to one of the five children killed by witches that she knows of.

"There was a family called Christiansen. They lived up on Holmenkollen, and they had an old oil-painting in the living room which they were very proud of. The painting showed some ducks in the yard outside a farmhouse. There were no people in the painting, just a flock of ducks on a grassy farmyard and the farmhouse in the back­ground. It was a large painting and rather pretty. Well, one day their daughter Solveg came home from school eating an apple. She said a nice lady had given it to her on the street. The next morning little Solveg was not in her bed. The parents searched everywhere but they couldn't find her. Then all of a sudden her father shouted, 'There she is! That's Solveg feeding the ducks!' He was pointing at the oil-painting, and sure enough Solveg was in it. She was standing in the farmyard in the act of throwing bread to the ducks out of a basket. The father rushed up to the painting and touched her. But that didn't help. She was simply a part of the painting, just a picture painted on the canvas."

"Did you ever see that painting, Grandmamma, with the little girl in it?"


"Many times," my grandmother said. "And the peculiar thing was that little Solveg kept changing her position in the picture. One day she would actually be inside the farmhouse and you could see her face looking out of the window. Another day she would be far over to the left with a duck in her arms."

"Did you see her moving in the picture, Grandmamma?"

"Nobody did. Wherever she was, whether out­side feeding the ducks or inside looking out of the window, she was always motionless, just a figure painted in oils. It was all very odd," my grand­mother said. "Very odd indeed. And what was most odd of all was that as the years went by, she kept growing older in the picture. In ten years, the small girl had become a young woman. In thirty years, she was middle-aged. Then all at once, fifty­ four years after it all happened, she disappeared from the picture altogether."


"You mean she died?" I said.


"Who knows?" my grandmother said.

-The Witches by Roald Dahl

This is possibly the most sinister book I've read in a long time, what with the witches techniques and whatnot. It gets more sinister when you find out about English witches, who while not as creative as Norwegian witches, enjoy turning children into animals to be killed by their parents. American witches turn children into hot dogs to get their parents to eat them.

(Canadian witches probably burn children for heat or something.)

Also, it was shorter than The House at Pooh Corner, so I finished it in one sitting, since it didn't last any longer than two cups of coffee which is how I time my reading sessions. Or if I really want to play videogames. I'm fickle.

I really liked it, except I had one complaint. I think it could have done without the last chapter. I think it ends perfectly on the SPOILER BEGINS HERE little mouse boy (for those who have not read, he is turned into a mouse) sitting in his grandma's lap discussing how they will die around the same time and he's happy about that.SPOILER ENDS HERE. I just didn't think it needed a huge quest at the end, is all.

I didn't have any way to get an illustration from it to show you, so I drew a guide to REAL WITCH traits.

Note, disguise pieces not really included:



Someone really needs to link me to where I can learn colour theory. I'm not sure why I was like 'yellow and purple? SIGN ME UP' when making this.

(no subject)

"But who is he, my pet?"

"He is Peter Pan, you know, mother."

At first Mrs. Darling did not know, but after thinking back into her childhood she just remembered a Peter Pan who was said to live with the fairies. There were odd stories about him, as that when children died he went part of the way with them, so that they should not be frightened. She had believed in him at the time, but now that she was married and full of sense she quite doubted whether there was any such person.

-Peter Pan by J.M. Barrie

Okay, I have never actually read this book before. I've just seen the movies. So I went into this being sure I knew what I was getting.

Anyway, it turns out this book is insane. THE DOG IS SENTIENT. They tallied up the money to debate giving Wendy and the boys away (that may just be depressing)! The mother handles Peter's shadow and doesn't even question someone's shadow being ripped off!

The dog is sentient! Also, Peter might be a psychopomp?

Here''s some Peter Pan fanart recs:

Lovely little illustration of the Darlings and Peter flying

Another by the same artist. Poor Wendybird :(

And some more!

Elaborate, energetic piece. SPOT THE HIDDEN HORROR

Captain Hook and Tinkerbell. my favourite part is actually her anklet and his frilly sleeve.

A cover from one of Boom Studios Muppet comics, Muppet Peter Pan. Also in that vein: Gonzo Hook, Tinkerpiggy, Tinkerpiggy and Kermit Pan, and finally Kermit Pan

Cute little cartoony Peter and Tink

A keen version of the home the Lost Boys live in

Ann is trying to tell me there's textual evidence that Hook was thrown out of the school he taught at for being a pedo. I am afeared because Ann only lies to me when it's funny